So Monday morning arrives and I’m on the phone to the unit to beg to be seen. This of course was a given, I guess that’s one benefit of having a fragile foot.  I was reassured so returned home.  I was dressing it twice a day morning and night and after a week the progress was looking great.  However me being me and never letting my T1 stand in the way I kept walking the dogs and going to work.  Although I knew this was putting pressure on the wound, I was not going to let this stop me.

This was the start of what I can only call the not quite there yet period.  A “Ahhh that looks really good” followed by “ok well at least you know why it’s broken down”.  It’s like a persistent itch you just can’t get to.

The following weeks were spent in a roller coaster of emotions;  time spent on my own in a darkening state of despair, to the false smile and it’s okay, answer each time I was asked how’s your foot. I’d been living with my ulcer for a couple of months now it was kinda becoming a part of me I even gave it a name Ulrick, Ulrick Ulcer. It was now starting to have a pattern. It would be debrided (by the professionals) then it seemed the callus built up and it closed no more. In essence nothing was changing. It had got to a point but then it was stuck. Nothing I seemed to do made too much difference.

Somewhere along the way the NHS replaced people by pathways and protocols, I felt strangely alone, like I had no one to turn to. I was disconnected from the people I should be able to go to and say “Oh I have done this what do you think?”  Well no this is where things need to change, as willing patients we could be taught and we could be advised, by so doing help us, make us feel more engaged, make us take ownership and reduce the strain on the NHS services and free up appointments for those that really can’t DIY. However to be able to offer that, they would have to say “OK Andy that looks pretty good but going forward you could try and get Sue to try a few things but if I am going to advise you, you will need to sign this) Present disclaimer “I will not sue your arse form”.

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